"Can you hear me NOW?!"...

Whirring our way back from Portsmouth on a grey and warm day, my cell phone rings. It is my youngest daughter, calling from Dad's house. She tells me all about her wey-cool day, and how excited she is about going tric-or-treating tonight. I ask her about her plans for the evening. The reception is getting a little wonky, scritchy-like and warbled.

"Well, first we are going to carve our pumpkins and make roasted seeds."

"Yeah? Wonderful!!! Those are so yummy!"

"yup. And then Emily's friend is coming over and we are going to make fake tits."

think think think...ah....

"Could you say that again, honey, I couldn't quite get that...."

"Then Emily's friend is coming over and we are making fake tits."

No. Um. That can't be right. She is only nine. Besides Emily does not need fake ones for her outfit, she is quite well distributed.

"Okay, Sweetie, can you spell out the last two words of that sentence?"

"S.T.E.A.K.T.I.P.S."

"Ah, very nice. Very yummy...okay Mommy's gotta go now...bye!"

Phew.

Like.

Really.